A Letter to Lisa from Top Chef

Yeah, yeah, I'm behind again. I missed one and had to wait until both were being rerun at a reasonable time to catch up. You'll get recaps soon. In the meantime, have a faux letter.



Dear Chef Lisa,

I'm deeply offended by your categorization of Polish sausage as somehow inferior. I'm going to guess you've never had Polish food, where it is a staple and treated with respect. And sausage cooked in beer is a classic. It may not be particularly upscale, but it's generally regarded as good, solid food.

I'm sorry you've never had good Polish sausage. But a good chef knows how to take an ingredient and dress it up regardless of its origins, and if you had gotten over your superiority complex you could've done that. The same side dishes that served for your fish-and-chorizo would have probably worked fine for it.

What's more, I'm amused at the idea that chorizo is somehow more upscale to you than Polish sausage. While I know it's quite possible to get high-quality chorizo, usually what I think of is the cheap stuff, made of dubious meats (though still highly tasty). The point is, if you can find a decent chorizo at Whole Foods (and no doubt you can), you can certainly find a decent kielbasa. They're both sausage, and like all sausage, both available in a variety of qualities. The only real difference is their origin.

I think if you guys had chosen to do just the chorizo, though, it might've worked out. I personally thought the addition of the fish was ridiculous and had nothing to do with the dish parameters. I also question your use of tequila for the alcohol, but that's another story.

In short, you fully deserved to be at the loser's table, so get over it.

Love,

JRB